Bret Michaels almost decapitated. No, that's not a made-up punchline.
Having ignored the entire telecast in favor of "Next Food Network Star" and a "Roseanne" marathon on TV Land, I only discovered this morning that Bret Michaels and Poison (with the cast of "Rock of Ages" -- is that some '80s musical?) opened the show. While finishing his performance on stage, Michaels took an Unskinny Bop to the face -- which you can see below -- or the kind of live TV "holy crap" moment your ADD-addled brain could watch over and over ... or at least until something juicy about Jon and Kate Gosselin enters the picture and distracts you again.
No word on how VH1's favorite man-whore is doing this morning. And honestly, do you really care?
Ah, the Tony's. Nuthin' but a good time!
-- Thomas Rozwadowski, email@example.com