LIVE: Project Runway Finale!
The time has come. It's finally here. We're so excited we're pooping fabric! (in a good way)
It's the final "Project Runway" on Bravo. (tear) Or is it? We don't know. We'll get back to you on that.
Anyway, the finale! Woo! Korto, Leanne and Tugboat Shirley. Er, Kenley, whatever ... Shirley seemed to fit with Tugboat. And her 50s-theme designs.
This live blog will be basically whatever we think and say. Enjoy. We'll try to edit the curses.
And we're "Auf ..."
Previously on "Project Runway" ...
8:01 p.m. We're recapping last week's trainwreck when we had to say goodbye to Jerrel and hellooo to Kenley and her suicidal ropeneck dress. We'll see what it looks like walking down Bryant.
Ooh, a runway first! All three women contestants on "PR" -- well, two women and one beast. OK, we're just being mean now. But we'll say it ... we miss the gays in the finale!
8:05 p.m. Apparently Leanne is looking for aliens during the model casting. We're not sure why. Do aliens like water? Also one of those models was once on "America's Next Top Model." We're not sure who, though.
8:06 p.m. Kenley is showing Tim some sort of garbage-bag of "Victorian" dress that he clearly does not like. She retreats into her normal mode of attack -- rude, defensive and annoying.
Kenley to Papa Gunn: "I have to disagree with that. My decisions are final." Tim Gunn raises an eyebrow in pure disbelief.
Kenley on the judges calling her out on her wedding dress inspiration: "It's insulting and I did not take my work from anyone else." Ummm. The Swan dress was so Bjork circa late 1990s.
Sara: "All you need to do is throw a swan head on there." Or a rope. It could be "tug-boat chic."
8:11 p.m: Kenley admits Tim may have had a point. Wait, what has happened here? Have one of Leanne's alien models invaded Kenley's body?
Two seconds later, she's back to bickering.
"I don't give an F what they say about it."
8:13 p.m. There's a thong shot. Seriously. This is why guys should watch this show.
Also, Kenley may or may not be getting whinier.
Leanne hits the nail on the head in describing Kenley's "Holly Hobby" collection --"somebody's child has been painting all over Kenley's outfits."
Korto crying tally is up to 1.
Sara and (guest of Channel Surfing Kelly McBride) get way too excited about a University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire commercial. Go Blugolds? Apparently there's no "E" in "blugold." Malavika is confused by that.
8:18 p.m. There's dog poo on the floor. Whose dog is that? Model picks it up wearing evening gown. Too bad the dog didn't take a dump on Kenley's Holly Hobby collection.
Last gatherround. Perhaps the LAST ever. Papa Gunn looks sad and announces the order in which they will appear at Bryant Park. Apparently Kenley will show first, followed by Korto and then Leanne.
8:19 p.m. Korto has hair buns for her model. Suddenly we're in the mood for Cinnabon.
8:21 p.m. Kenley mentions her father but no tugboat reference (although someone among us thinks that Leanne's sister looks like a tugboat... no names will be mentioned). Her mom is also wearing that hideous shade of red lipstick.
Leanne is having problems with a "limp top." No one wants that.
8:22 p.m. First sighting of Season 4 winner Christian Siriano.
8:27 p.m. Heidi welcomes all.
Why is Michael Kors wearing sunglasses inside the tent? J-Lo will not be guest-judging because of a dubious "foot injury" that may or may not be related to her ample bedankadonk, but Tim Gunn will take her place. It's totally appropriate. Perhaps he can also insure his ass.
Blayne is tan again. Chris March sighting. It's like a reunion show. Oh, wait, they're not having one this season. Boooooo. How dare Bravo try to make us watch "Top Design" for bits of a reunion show!
8:31 p.m. Kenley's "dream wardrode" comes down the runway. The first piece is fairly good, but everything else seems cheap, painted on and unoriginal. Oh, wait, she DID paint on her clothes.
Stella sighting in the audience. Michael Kors lowers his sunglasses. Not a good sign.
Bjork walks down the line and there's weak applause. Why does everyone have weeds on their head? Weed is whack. Just say no.
8:35 p.m. Korto is adorable. Her husband is hot and her child is very adorable.
Her line -- inspired by nature and very ethnic -- is going over well with our crowd. We just lip-read and Neenah Gah-cia may have said "that's fabulous." Either that or she was cursing at Michael Kors.
We love the colors in Korto's line. The cuts. The designs. It's ethnic without being kitsch. Everyone seems to agree with us.
8:37 p.m. Dear mousy Leanne introduces her wave-inspired line of whites and teals.
The colors aren't blowing us away, but her line is cohesive and -- pardon the pun -- flows together very well. It's hard to pick our favorite between Leanne and Korto, but if we must... we'd give the slight edge to Korto just for the variety in her line with color and shape. If Kenley wins, Kelly will attempt to poop fabric. And not in a good way.
Chris March is impressed by Korto. Nick Verreos is a fan of Leanne. Jillian from last season disappoints us all by picking Kenley. What happened to you, Kenley?
8:44 p.m. 54 percent of voters think Leanne is the winner. Democracy rules!
8:45 p.m. Michael Kors compliments Kenley. Take your sunglasses, off! You're blinded! All the judges seem to be very positive... but Nina Garcia points out that Kenley has once again plagirized from other designers.
8:46 p.m. Judges love Korto (yay!). "Effortlessly cohesive." "Sublime." Only critique is that she may have overdesigned.
8:47 p.m. The judges love Leanne's variety but are worried she may get pigeonholed. Michael Kors to Leanne: "You're going to be Petals Marshall, which sounds like a stripper."
Korto crying tally: 2
8:52 p.m. The judges seem to agree they're "doing the right thing." Please let that not include picking Kenley.
8:56 p.m. Kenley is kicked out. THE PEOPLE REJOICE! She thinks the decision is BS. Go away, Kenley. Go home to your tugboat.
8:57 p.m. And the winner is... Leanne. We cheer because we love darling mousy Leanne! Although we love Korto and we're sorry to see her so heartbroken.
8:59 p.m. Final quote of the night is from our winner: "One hundred thousand dollars. Drinks are on this brotha." From the whitest girl ever. Awesome.
-- Sara Boyd, firstname.lastname@example.org and Malavika Jagannathan, email@example.com