Randy Jackson Presents: America's Annoyingly Addictive Dance Crew!

Yes, that dawg Randy Jackson got to me with his America's Best Dance Crew. What a jerk.

He put together the unavoidable, sickenly addictive dance show formula that I can't help but watch. Damn him. What, all those "listen dawg's," "I like you but I wasn't feelin' it tonight's" and "Bro, listen, bro, dawg, listen's" weren't enough to keep you occupied from ruining my Thursday nights? I've tried to avoid it, I have, believe me. It's impossible. It's got everything you want and more. Guys dancing in masks, on skates, girls doing gratuitous booty shakes and Mario Lopez. Yeah, Mario Lopez - Mr. AC Slater himself, huge dimples and all.

The basis of the show is dance crews from all over America - and by America, clearly I mean Southern California - each compete for the title of America's Best Dance Crew. Each crew, or Kru as I like to spell it, must come with their own crazy style or quirk. We've got Breaksk8 (yes, they spell it like Sk8er Boi) who are a bunch of crazy white boys, minus one, who bust their moves on top of old school roller skates. Then there's JabbaWockeeZ (seriously, I can't make up these spellings, it's totally str8 frum da ghetto, yo) who are a bunch of Asians, minus one, who pop-it-and-lock-it with creepy Michael Meyer's masks. There's Status Quo, a group of flipping, crazy tricksters and yeah, since they've got the moves, clearly they're black. Then you've got Kaba Modern, who are, um, well just a bunch of move-busting Asians.

If that wasn't enough to tickle your running-man-dancing fancy, let me tell you about the judges. Oh the judges - arguably the best part of the show. First off, there's JC Chasez. Who you may ask? And rightly so. Remember when *Nsync broke up and you cried your eyes out for months? Yeah, he was the one that was like "Hey, I was in *Nsync, now I'm doing a solo record. I'm going to start with a song called 'Some Girls Dance with Women.'" Then, you never heard from him again. Well, he's back. And the scary part is ... he's arguably the least annoying judge. Think of him as the Simon Cowell of America's Best Dance Crew minus the gratuitous chest hair, British accent and then add a douchey scarf or red, pattened leather jacket.

Shane Sparks is definitely the best judge based on the fact that he, um, knows how to dance?! Hmm... seems like an obvious trait for a judge who critiques dancers but literally the cheese stands alone here. I'll be honest Sparks can get a little heavy with his Randy Jackson-like "dawgs," "yo, yo, yo's" and "killed it's." But watching him reminds me that So You Think You Can Dance will be on again, hopefully real soon.

Then there's the final judge. Even saying her name gets my gag reflex going. That's right, it's talentless, ridiculously annoying, want-to-punch-her-in-the-face-every-time-she-speaks: Lil' Mama. Yes, the girl that is blamed for creating and spreading "Lip Gloss" upon the Earth has unfortunately not faded away into one-hit wonder non-existence. Instead she's judging and critiquing no-name crews who let's be honest have more talent in their high-kicking pinky toe than Lil' Mama. She'll say things like "I feel like you guys really brought it, but you really need to bring it, ya know what I'm sayin'" or "Ya'll are hot, like I really love you, you're hot, but I don't really feel tha heat, ya know?"

Last night's episode saw the gang taking on Broadway. I mean, what's more hip-hop than Broadway, right? I must say JabbaWockeeZ were again a crowd favorite - busting it up to "All that Jazz" with all sorts of hip-hop Charlestons and broadway-esque freezes. And although they went "gay Cabana boy" for one scene of their performance to the Dreamgirls hit "You're Going to Love Me," BreakSk8 took their final lap on the dance floor and were asked to roll out.

Next week, it's down to three - which means it's the finale and more importantly, that the digging claws of this horribly addictive show will finally let loose and I will regain non-Lil' Mama consciousness.

-- Sara Boyd, sboyd2@greenbaypressgazette.com