(Almost) day after "Lost" ramblings

I love "Lost" You love "Lost." Let's dive right into the weekly tradition of paying too much attention to things like old videotapes marked "Red Sox" and dead rabbits for dinner.

Friday was packed with print stuff, so my rambling tradition -- enjoyed by all three of our "Lost" regulars, ahem -- had to get pushed back to a less congested time. Not that I was all that eager to break down "The Other Woman," an episode so contrived, it made the rotten "Eggtown" smell like roses. But hey, like the now-retired Brett Favre, it's how "Lost" operates. You take the good with the bad. Plus, anything coming off the mind-blowing "Constant" was bound to be a downer.

My biggest disappointment? Lindelof and Cuse aren't giving "Lost" fans much credit, because everything about "The Other Woman" was about trying to pull the ol' switcheroo. Problem is, the moves were incredibly transparent, and have been for quite awhile -- and I'm not claiming to be the most astute "Lost" fan in the world. For instance, the opening scene with Juliet talking about her "celebrity status" with Harper was designed to make us believe she was part of the off-island Oceanic Six. Eh, not falling for that one, braniacs!

Even the highly enjoyable Locke-Ben interactions were twisted so that fans who've come to infer that Purple Face is ultimately good, or at least "good" enough to get Sayid to join his protect-the-island-at-all-costs cause, can get worked up about his being a devious bastard again. Getting too comfortable with the good-evil dynamic between Ben and the freighter folk? Ah, we'll show you that Ben is really a control freak who is manipulating Juliet, and GASP, may have even wanted Goodwin to die at the hands of Ana Lucia because of jealousy! Now, who's REALLY evil?

Just one problem: I don't care about Goodwin. I only kinda care about Juliet. And I DEFINITELY don't care about Juliet and Jack, which means Ben going off the deep end about that relationship is a plot contrivance bordering on Nikki and Paolo levels. Jack already hates Ben. Ben has already proven he'll shoot someone when threatened. The whole drawn out "Days of Our Lives-ish" nature of Juliet's flashback was incredibly disappointing. But hey, it was still better than finding out how Jack got his tattoos ...

So what did we learn?

* Charles Widmore is behind the freighter mission. Figured that.

* Ben is smitten with Juliet because she looks just like "her." Could it be Annie, Ben's childhood crush? And hasn't Ben mentioned before that Juliet looks like Jack's ex-wife? Hmmm.

* The jungle whispers are back, just in time for scorned Harper to show up and deliver Ben's message to Juliet. Coincidence?

* Kate and Jack have turned into gullible morons who know Faraday and Charlotte might be up to no good, yet don't take proper preventative measures against them. Plus, Charlotte is just really annoying to me.

* Hurley is dominant at both ping pong and horseshoes. You're going down in foosball next, Sawyer!

* Something's up with that $3.2 million dollars request. Was Miles speaking to Ben in code? After all, Harper said he was "right where he wanted to be."

* Ben makes the first allusion to Widmore's possible intent for finding the island. Mass exploitation, or better yet, the American way! I can see it now: "Miracle Island: The Cure For Cancer and Fish Biscuits Await!" Also, I think "The Simpsons" did this with Ned Flanders and Praiseland.

* Which leads to Ben's continued manipulation of Locke and the coming insurrection. The look on Ben's face as he playfully told Sawyer and Hurley "see you guys at dinner," well, it almost made up for everything lacking in Juliet's backstory. Michael Emerson is phenomenal.

* Still, I love bad-ass Locke so much, I just wish he's put on his Moses beard, grab his staff, and stick with a master plan. Wishy-washy Locke was fine at first, but I guess the show needs Ben to serve that greater purpose of being the know-it-all who can't be disposed of so easily. Still ... c'mon Locke, man up! No wonder Terry O'Quinn is often frustrated playing the character.

* And finally, unless it's a swerve, Michael should be the man on the boat based on next week's preview.

So, anyone care to disagree and call "The Other Woman" a stunner? Did I miss something while smugly dismissing this episode? Is Michael on the boat going to be a big deal? Any more theories on Desmond's "I Love the 90s" flashtime episodes?

Leave a comment without fear of Ben-like retribution. Promise.

-- Thomas Rozwadowski, trozwado@greenbaypressgazette.com