"Top Chef" Power Rankings are back!
Several ugly weeds have been pulled from the "Top Chef" garden of eatin', which means it's finally time for Channel Surfing's annual power poll of deliciousness.
Rules are same as last year: Rank all the remaining contestants from top to bottom. If someone in your top three wins the Quickfire this week, you get a point. If your No. 1 seed wins the Elimination Challenge, you get 5 points. Each week, you also have to designate someone to sit at the bottom, and if that person is eliminated, you also get 5 points.
New to the festivities this year: Press-Gazette photojournalist and avid foodie, Evan Siegle (in both hair and talent, he's like the Richard Blais of our photo staff.) Winner gets bragging rights and a free Channel Surfing neck tattoo courtesy of Press-Gazette editorial cartoonist Joe Heller (OK, maybe not).
Can't remember what happened last season: Blog reader Livin' La Vida Dusty grabbed the crown in the final week after being the only person to correctly pick the entire order -- Hosea, Stefan, Carla -- netting him a whopping 25 points. Up until that point, Kelly McBride and Thomas Rozwadowski were deadlocked at 29 points (Kelly picked Stefan, Thomas went with Crazy Eyes Carla).
Now, let the ranking begin! Trash talk, as always, is highly recommended.
1. Michael V, you bore me
3. Kevin the jolly lumberjack
4. Misogynist Mike
-- Kelly McBride
1. Michael Vottaggio, aka: Chef Slim Shady, aka: Tony Hawk
2. Kevin Gillespie, aka: Zach Galifianakis
3. Jennifer “someone needs braces” Carroll
4. Bryan “I do not smile ever” Voltaggio
5. Eli “Seriously Jewish” Kirshtein
6. Ash Fulk, more like As... nevermind
7. Michael “Jagga bombs!” Isabella
8. Ashley “Ben Kweller/Young Bob Dylan” Merriman
9. Mattin “red scarf = French” Noblia
10. Ron “Michael Clarke Duncan” Duprat
11. Laurine "So forgettable, I initially left her off this list" Wickett
12. Robin “She’s still on?” Leventhal
-- Sara Boyd
2. Kevin aka Lumberjack
3. Bryan, the boring-er brother
4. Ash (aka if John C. Reilly and Jim Gaffigan mated)
5. Misogynist Mike
6. Brother Mike
7. Eli (Jonah Hill)
12. HE-SHE ASHLEY
-- Malavika Jagannathan
1. Kevin Gillespie
2. Michael V.
3. Bryan V.
4. Eli Kirshtein
5. Jen Carroll
6. Ron Duprat
7. Ash Fulk
8. Robin Leventhal
9. Michael Isabella
10. Laurine Wickett
11. Ashley Merriman
12. Mattin Noblia
-- Evan Siegle
1. "Big Red" Kevin
2. Michael Voltaggio, the less bo-ring brother
3. Dopey Face Jen
4. Eli aka "Jewwy Jewerson"
5. Bryan Voltaggio, the more bo-ring brother
6. Misogynist Mike
7. Biggie Smalls Ron
8. Big Gay Ash
9. Big Gay He-She Ashley (Ben Lee/Young Paul Westerberg)
10. Laurine, so forgettable she doesn't deserve a nickname
11. Mattin, the Frenchy who can't make French food
12. Talky Talk Robin
-- Thomas Rozwadowski
3. Michael V.
5. Michael D. (the D. is for douchebag)
8. Laurine (What kind of name is that? She sounds like she belongs on the periodic table, right between selenium and bromine.)
-- Adam Reinhard
Leave your own below! You have until tomorrow's episode begins. And be sure to stay with us every week to keep pace!