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Friday, August 8, 2008

The Last Comic ... I'll ever watch

How dare you, NBC?

As if it wasn't bad enough that you made me sit through what can only be described as a glorified two-hour long promo for your upcoming season -- masked as the two-hour special of "Last Comic Standing" -- but then you have the nerve to rig the votes and crown Sucky Suckface Iliza Shlesinger as the winner?

Yes, I said rig the votes. C'mon people, there's no humanly possible way that stuck-up, self-righteous, arrogant bra-stuffer could have won "Last Comic Standing." It's just not possible. Sure, she has one funny joke for every 100,000 uttered, but clearly she did not have the goods to triumph over Hottie McHotterson Jeff Dye or Christopher Walken's long-lost vocal twin Marcus.

OK, "goods" may have been a poor choice of words. We all know that's what sealed her victory -- lesson learned: cute blondes with big (and toward the end of the season, even bigger) boobs win in life and on crappy reality TV shows. Triumph the Insult Comic Dog said it best when he told Iliza it was such a pleasure watching her grow in the series ... from a B cup to a C cup.

I'll be honest, when the show began, I so badly wanted to root for Iliza. There had never been a female victor in "Last Comic Standing" and she was funnier than annoying Esther Ku, but man, she went into "rhymes with witch"-mode awfully fast. Really, with any reality TV show, people need to understand that talent only goes so far to get the audience votes -- personality will take you the rest of the way. Sure, it's a talent competition and you are competing against others, but no one likes a sore loser and clearly, everytime she got the graveyard vote to battle it out -- she was a huge baby about it. Then when she'd emerge victorious she'd be all cocky about it. Um, yeah, you beat out God's Pottery, Esther Ku, Papa CJ and Paul Foot -- that's nothing to brag about.

But I digress. Iliza -- well, America's supposed votes for Iliza -- are really not the worst thing about this year's "Last Comic" finale. Even more repulsive then Iliza's victory is that NBC used us. They knew, as Americans, we're too lazy to change the channel once we've selected a show. And they used that fact against us. It was a show of plug-after-plug -- "Here's what's coming up this year in 'Deal or No Deal' ... Howie, take it away!" "And don't forget to check out the Olympics in Beijing -- right here, on NBC." Oh how fast the buyable sell themselves out. Bill Bellamy, you should be ashamed.

It's a shame too, because the show did have potential for hilarity. Triumph the Insult Comic Dog was inappropriate as always and really funny. Even Presidential candidates Senators John McCain and Barack Obama tried their hands at a jokey joke. (By the way, McCain -- it's not funny to joke about the fact that no one thinks you're funny, it's just sad. Obama definitely smoked your ass on that front. The bowling bit? Priceless.) And it was great to see Jon Reep back again, showing what a true "Last Comic" winner is made of.

But then they brought out Jon Lovitz, who let's be honest, hasn't had an unscripted funny joke in decades. I tried watching, I did, but after a while it just started to get really uncomfortable and sad. Thank you DVR, you saved the last ounce of respect I have for Jon Lovitz.

So I guess my point is, with so little to be laughing about from last night's episode, this will be the LAST "Last Comic Standing" that I tune in for. I had high hopes when Dye and Marcus made it to the finals, but that was quickly and harshly squashed. Now I'm left with nothing but the memories of the funny times I had with "Last Comic."

Maybe they'll have a great season next year -- one that doesn't use gimmicks like a graveyard and play solely on the idiotic commentary of who's a bad roommate in the house. But until that day arrives, or if it ever does, the memories of laughing during that show will have to be enough.

-- Sara Boyd,

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Mmm, your harsh invectives are delicious, Sara, thank you.

I stopped watching "Comic" a few weeks back, partly because I hated Iliza so much, but mostly because I strongly disagreed with who was getting voted off. I LIKED God's Pottery. I LIKED Papa CJ. I FRIGGIN' LOVED Paul Foot. So if the voting audience didn't share my sense of humor, I wasn't going to feel particularly compelled to tune it for all those lame Dane Cook wannabes.

I do feel bad for how much I dislike Iliza, though, mostly because it seems to be so hard for a woman to make it in the world of stand-up. Perhaps her level of viciousness is what it takes. That said, though, I'd still take Esther Ku over Iliza any day. Sure, she was a little annoying behind-the-scenes, but I'm not paying a $20 cover fee to watch her behind-the-scenes -- I'm only there for the jokes.


By Blogger Press-Gazette blogger, At August 8, 2008 at 10:44 AM  

Wow! Admittedly LCS is a terrible show. The rule structure is juvenile. I write rule structure for a living and these producers are absolutely clueless. The comics are up and coming, so clearly they aren't going to be as good as people who have been on the road a long time, BUT, as soon as I saw that the writer referred to Iliza as the "Bra Stuffer" really sad...I knew immediately that the writer was female. That "self righteous bra stuffer" as she says, happens to NOT have grown from a B to a C during the show...In fact, she started as a double freakin' D and wore a minimizer to look smaller. (I have known Iliza personally for several years. She is a solid, well balanced girl/woman who is confident yet humble...yes, that's true) Isn't it pathetic that with all the good points she had to make about things that needed improvement in the show she threw in her bitchy little insecurity by attacking another woman's body part....Well, whatever you had to say about the show lost a lot of credibility with me...then again, the comedians get better after years of telling jokes, maybe her writing will mature as well.

By Anonymous Anonymous, At August 8, 2008 at 4:43 PM  

I haven't watched since the days of John Heffron. He should really have his own sitcom by now ... at least on TBS or something.

-- Tom

By Blogger Press-Gazette blogger, At August 8, 2008 at 4:52 PM  

So true, Sara. I am a Last Comic Fan but your A+ journalism and witty writing style have made me re-evalute my beliefs. Maybe LCS could've been better if the Olympics hadn't rushed it through the whole season in 4 episodes or however many, but they better step it up next season and send you through to the finals.

By Anonymous alissa, At August 18, 2008 at 4:01 PM  

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