Day after "Lost" ramblings

I love "Lost" You love "Lost." Let's dive right into the weekly tradition of paying too much attention to things like the hidden meaning of cheesy Olivia Newton-John movies and savory boxes of Dharma red wine.

Aaron? AARON?

Despite backing off from theorizing in a previous "Lost" post, some kudos are due to Mr. Andy Behrendt for at least picking a baby as Kate's "he" in the airport scene with Jack. Now, we don't know for sure Aaron is the "he" Kate vaguely referred to, but these days, it's about as safe an assumption as you can make with this show. So while, yes, it didn't turn out to be Sweet Baby James (Ford), it did turn out to be a tiny guy with blonde hair. Andy just chose the non-existent baby based on conventional wisdom. All I know is that I almost said out loud, "Hey, he has Sawyer's blonde hair!" before the bombshell. And I also thought it might be Jack's kid about five minutes prior. Wow. O-fer-2.

Anyway, until the twist ending, this episode was easily the weakest of the first four. The closing seconds with Aaron as Kate's "kid" was a masterful stroke, and the water-cooler reverberations, subsequent guesswork will certainly make up for a pretty dull flash-forward on Miss Austen's behalf. Most frustrating of all, the signs for Aaron's reveal were right there. Claire and Kate's little "I don't know how you play mommy" pow-wow at the clothesline. Kate flat-out saying she wasn't preggers to Sawyer. The fact that Kate had zero sympathy for her dying mom's request to see her "blood-related" grandson.

So what does it all mean? Well, my mind, as usual, is racing like mad. I give you exhibits A, B, C, D and E.

A) Claire is going to die. She's not around to take care of Aaron in a post-island world where Hurley is smacked by dead Charlie, Jack has a crazy beard and Sayid is an assassin for Ben. Safe money is that someone perishes during the season, and to be honest, without Charlie around, there isn't much for Claire to do these days. Her death (more speculation to come) could serve as a decisive plot point and rallying cry in the island battle between good and evil.

One thing we do know: Claire will not be dying of grief for Charlie. C'mon, "Lost" writers! Give her a moment of deep, tear-stained mourning for our favorite Drive Shaft rocker! She could at least lead a tribute sing-along of "You allllllllll, everybody!"

B) Desmond had a vision of Claire and Aaron getting on a helicopter -- the entire impetus for Charlie taking the long, slow, salty drink of death. We're going to assume that the writers aren't lazy enough to chalk that one up to a "psychic misstep" on Des' part. Something has to happen between the helicopter ride and the Oceanic Six's return home. Something -- dun, dun, DUN! -- dramatic.

C) Jack has an issue with seeing Aaron, and knowing Doc Savior, it's likely guilt-related. The episode wanted you to think Jack's baby phobia would be a result of Daddy Sawyer's eyes staring back at him. Turns out it's something else -- something Kate has accepted, but still gives Jack the heebie-jeebies. It's also odd considering Jack and Claire are related, so you'd think he would want to be "there" for his nephew. Unless of course ...

D) Jack feels responsible for Claire's death at the hands of the Freighter Folk by calling them in the first place. The exact line from last night's scene with Kate and Jack: "I know why you don't want to see the baby, Jack. But until you do. Until you want to ..."

After all, the baddies control the helicopter. While we're at it, let's just toss Ben's not-so-subtle "think with your heart" jab into the mix from last week and wildly suggest that Sayid might be responsible for Claire's actual death. It stands to reason that the death of someone as innocent as Claire would prove to Sayid that those on the "list" are worth gunning down. We at least know that they're even worse than Ben.

E) Regardless of how/if Claire dies, Aaron is part of the Oceanic Six lie. Not necessarily as Kate's biological child, but at least to have helped make her hero of the plane crash and provide cover for her litany of crimes. I don't know how it connects with the Oceanic Six -- especially considering the four we know of are spread out at this point -- or how time factors in. Aaron was a big boy at the end. But we've talked about deals in this space before, and everyone needs to be on the same page.

Also, Jack did say on the stand that "eight survived" as part of the perpetuated media lie, one Kate said Jack was repeating so often, he probably believes it by now. Is it Oceanic Six plus Claire and Aaron? Claire died on the island, so Aaron is "adopted" by Kate? Whatever the case may be, can we all agree that Claire is not going to make it past this season?

Other highlights:

* The episode was called "Eggtown," which according to Lostpedia refers to bartering lingo used during the Great Depression. To arrive at an "eggtown" meant to accept a bad deal because eggs were readily available and perishable. The episode literally started with eggs -- Locke giving Ben the last two for breakfast before throwing them against a wall. Locke also killed a chicken (no more eggs), and doesn't appear willing to deal with anyone as part of his not-quite, kinda-is dictatorship. Either way, two big deals overwhelmed this episode: Miles' 3.2 million dollar extortion ploy with Ben, and Kate accepting 10 years probation with no out-of-state travel. Whose deal will end up backfiring, thus leaving them with egg on their face? Sorry, I had to do it.

* "He invited us all over for dinner." Claire's in the mood for Stove Top stuffing. Plus, I just loved the domesticated touch of Locke hosting a dinner party. Please tell me a "Kiss the Cook" apron was somehow going to be involved.

* How awesome are Hurley and Sawyer as roommates? I mean, who wouldn't want to watch that "Lost" spin-off? "Bosom Buddies II?" Two and a Half Sweaty Men?" "James and the Fat Man?" I should really be in pitch meetings.

* "Do not treat me like I'm one of them!" Miles is bold and brazen, but appears to be biting off more than he can chew with Ben. Oh, and of course, Locke's grenade. Man, I'm on fire today!

* I noticed during the pop-up repeat that Faraday had an uncomfortable sign of recognition when Lapidus looked his way upon hearing Desmond ask for Penny Widmore. Here's to Charles, Penny's father, being the architect (and perhaps economist) behind Matthew Abaddon's mission.

* The Faraday memory experiment -- or the card test with Charlotte -- will likely be more important that any of us know. After all, it isn't coincidence that the pop-up episode two weeks ago made it a point to tell us that Faraday was under someone else's care when he saw the Oceanic crash footage on TV. Something isn't working right in the ol' noggin.

Line of the night: "I'm responsible for the well-being of the island" -- John Locke to Miles. Not the people, mind you. The island.

Quip of the night: "You just totally Scooby Doo'd me" -- Hurley "Montezuma" Reyes

Some great comments for last week's episode. Let's keep it up and bring more "Lost" fans into the fold, because it's always more fun when people are not only reading, but trying to figure out the puzzle together. Though I just noticed that I basically replicated one of Andy's observations from this morning. Maybe we're both having the same Desmond-like visions? Or maybe we're both gluttons for punishment and like being dead wrong 90 percent of the time?

That's it for me. I'm off to watch my VHS copy of "Satan's Doom."

-- Thomas Rozwadowski, trozwado@greenbaypressgazette.com