Mobisodes? Webisodes? Who cares, it's new "Lost"!

Because we weren't anticipating that February "Lost" premiere date enough, the sadistic bastards at ABC decided to whet our appetites even further by unleashing a series of shorts, entitled "Lost: Missing Pieces." The two-minute "mobisodes" (so-called because they first air on Verizon mobile phones; hence, "mobile episodes") are intended to give hardcore fans extra insight into plotlines and character arcs. The webisodes (which they are also so-called because they also air on ABC.com -- seriously, marketing dudes, just call them "quickies") feature cast regulars and are scripted by regular series writers like Carlton Cuse and Adam Horowitz.

Whoa, red flag there, guys! I know the "Lost" castaways are cut off from civilization, but don't "Lost" writers know there's a strike goin' on? Over internet residuals, no less? Have the writers gone all Young Ben, joining the Others across the picket lines and killing off the Dharma bums?

Well, no, not really. The scripts for all 13 mobwebisodes were knocked out before the strike struck, and according to this article at EW.com, the Hawaii production team is still at work. So not only are half the webimobiquickisodes already shot, the rest should soon follow. Phew!

Airing each Monday, there have only been two "Missing Pieces" released so far, with the intent to post one each week until the HIGHLY anticipated season four premiere. Like I said, the shorts are meant to flesh out previously explored stories, and as such don't make for the most exciting viewing.

Episode 1 features Jack and his father, Christian, shortly before Jack's wedding. Christian gives Jack a wristwatch. That's about it. No smoke monster or Jacob's ghost or nothin'. Well, there's actually a touching bit where Christian asks Jack to be a better father than he had been, which I doubt makes up for his epic levels of jerkitude, but Jack seemed to appreciate it, so who am I to judge? (A fan, damn it -- a fan!)

The second short is better, mostly by virtue of starring Hurley. Our rotund hero is in search of wine to take on his Season 2 picnic with Libby (who might even have been getting shot during these two minutes) when he is confronted by another islander, nicknamed Frogurt. Frogurt is played by that actor who looks and sounds like Steve Buscemi's kid brother. I think he was in a DiGiornio's pizza ad once. Anyway, Frogurt's all, "Hey man, are you gonna make a move on Libby, or are you gonna let a real man have a chance?" And Hurley's all, "Oh no, you didn't! I'm going on a picnic with her right now, bee-yotch!" And Frogurt's like, "Oh yeah?" And Hurley's like, "Yeah!"

And that's it.

Like I said, nothing mind-blowing or controversial. But if they help pass the time until we get back to the island, I'll even refer to them as "mobisodes" if they want me to. Head over to ABC.com to check them out for yourself.

-- Adam Reinhard, lifeisfunnybutnothahafunny@gmail.com