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Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Let the punishment begin!

When we last left our "American Idol" Punishment Pool, our four intrepid bloggers were all at square one, heads on the chopping block, awaiting their fate from Simon Cowell in an executioner's hood.

Adam's contestant, Matt Giraud, finished highest in EW's Power Rankings two weeks ago, which meant he was supposed to watch last Tuesday's "Motown Night" episode. Except President Obama wanted to talk about our crap-tastic economy AGAIN, so "Idol's" performance show was shifted to Wednesday night ... and you want to talk about punishment? That collided with DVR-less Adam's precious "Lost" viewing, and frankly, we couldn't torture the poor sap to that Sayid-like degree.

Giving up good TV for bad TV? That's not what Channel Surfing is about. We're only engaging in this masochistic behavior because Tuesday is a dead night for TV, anyways.

So, by skipping last week, it turns out Sara's contestant, Michael Sarver, got the ol' heave-ho. That complicates things a bit, so in order to simplify the parameters and work within the given "Idol" week, here's how it'll play out from here.

Adam will be watching tonight as part of his original punishment, with the recap due sometime tomorrow. Sara will sit out this week, and as long as no one else loses their singer on Wednesday, she'll get another week off to make up for the lost Obama week. However, if one of us loses a contestant, she'll have to bite the bullet and re-join us with a new randomly selected performer next week (we'll likely spare her the consensus top choice of the moment, Adam Lambert) to avoid mass confusion. Same rules apply for last week's performance-based results -- which saw Giraud top the Power Rankings again (MJ's Lil Rounds was at 7, Thomas' Scott MacIntyre was dead last). Adam will not be punished for that since we want to get back to square one again.

OK, that was super confusing to write. But trust us, it makes sense. Just know that we're all being punished by mentioning "Idol" on this blog each week or even knowing who the hell Adam Lambert is. Though something tells me getting to read Channel Surfing Adam's recap on "Top Downloads" night (brush up on your Lady Gaga, fool!) will make up for it all.

From Adam, via e-mail at 2:38 p.m.: "'Top Downloads' night? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN!?!?! Dear God in Heaven, I'm done for."

Bwahahahahahaha ....

-- The Channel Surfing staff

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Adam's Last Will and Testament

I, Adam Reinhard, being of sound mind and body, hereby bequeath the following should I meet my untimely demise watching "American Idol" tonight:

To those cute kids from "Slumdog Millionaire," I leave my entire collection of TV on DVD sets. I think they'll really get a kick out of "Freaks and Geeks."

To Kristen Bell, I leave the poster that she and the rest of the "Veronica Mars" cast signed for me at a publicity appearance at the Mall of America, in the hopes she will mourn me and swear off all other men forever.

To anyone willing to do it, I leave you my TV, so that you may drop it on Tom Rozwadowski's gleefully laughing head.

By Blogger Press-Gazette blogger, At March 31, 2009 at 3:41 PM  

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