she did what?!

Before the return of Gossip Girl, the show's creators prepared us all for a little shock and awe with the promise of plot lines that were truly gossip-worthy. Now, five episodes in and with only one more left in the season, I'd say they delivered on their promise -- especially in the last two episodes.

Clearly, there is just too much gossip for one blogger to discuss, so Channel Surfers Sara Boyd and Malavika Jagannathan will attempt to tackle all the juicy details. Now, just in case some of you still haven't watched the last two shows (Malavika had to dodge my spoilers for a week before she was able to see the "gay bomb" episode), I'd recommend skipping this post because we WILL RUIN IT FOR YOU.

Sara: Two weeks ago, "GG" fans learned quite a lot. It could easily be argued that the episode "All About My Brother" had everything, and I mean everything, that makes for good TV. The episode brought Serena's little bro flying out of the closet -- along with Jenny's new beau Asher, the pretty boy from the east side who couldn't be gay because he was rich (um, what?). When the "gay bomb" dropped, it seemed the show was at its climax but no, "GG's" writers throw a sex tape and murder at us. Serena's shady past with fellow party gal Georgina (or Sarah) had been crawling back for a few episodes, but I don't think anyone was expecting the truth to be what S told Blair: "I killed someone." It looked as though S might want to start shopping for blaze orange accessories.

Malavika, what were your reactions to Serena's big secret?

Malavika: I audibly gasped. I mean, wow. There were no words. Killed someone? Forget Upper East Side -- let's take the Number 5 to the Bronx on that one.

With that 'wow' finish, I had high hopes for last night's episode in which S's dirty secret would hopefully be explained. Was it a crime of passion? A quiet poisoning perhaps? A street knifing? So many juicy options! Then the truth surfaces - in between tears and flashbacks to the night she and Nate did the dirty post-wedding fun - it turns out all S did was encourage some guy to do a line of cocaine that he himself brought, causing him to suffer a seizure and die. Big frickin' whoop.

Biggest. Letdown. Ever. Thoughts on last night's less-than-gossip-worthy episode?

Sara: I agree. What a huge letdown. You can't say you "killed someone" if what you meant to say was you saw someone do drugs once. It went from murder to misdemeanor in a hurry. And the "sex tape?" Merely a make-out tape at best. I really felt like the producers decided to have this huge episode, with promises of big gossip, then realized, "Wait, we can't have our main character go to jail for life" so came up with this lame explanation. The whole episode just bugged me last night. From Serena telling Dan she cheated on him because she didn't want to tell him she "saw someone do drugs once" to S all of a sudden being very comfortable telling Blair, Chuck and Nate the whole story.

Not to mention, the beginning of the episode had Serena passed out in an elevator, having apparently been out partying (by herself?) the night before and leaving with three guys. Hello? Explanation? Nada. When Serena's suddenly caring mother left her own rehearsal dinner to help S confront the dead coke addict's parents (which they didn't show one minute of) I nearly lost it. What happened to this show?!

I haven't even touched on the new Georgina/Sarah character yet. What do you think about her role in all of this?

Malavika: Georgina/Sarah (Michelle Trachtenburg of 'Buffy' fame) was billed as the show's newest villain, without the moments of kindness Blair and Chuck often betray that make them likable. Bottom line: she's kinda annoying and not really that evil. The worst she's done so far is try to steal Dan from S and offer up the mediocre make-out tape as blackmail. It's pretty pathetic for a villain who seems to spend most of her time in a coffee shop or on a park bench wearing sunglasses.

Did I mention she's annoying, yet? I hope the storyline with her and Dan doesn't extend past this season but I get the sense it will.

Sara: Yes. Unfortunately Georgina, or Sarah, or suckface, is here to stay. It seems it may take more than a confident and "no longer afraid" Serena to scare Georgina and her huge sunglasses away. Not to mention, everyone else hates her, so all the more reason to stick around.

Last night's plot of Serena being cold to Dan, Dan coincidentally getting a call from "good listener" Sarah, and ending with Dan and Georgina/Sarah playing tonsil hockey then leaving for god knows where was way too predictable. Unfortunately the DVR that I was watching the episode on cut off before the full preview for next week's finale, but all I have to say is it better be good. This week's lame follow-up to the most drama-filled episode ever has left me losing faith in gossip. Hey, "Gossip Girl," here's a suggestion. Spotted: An exciting plot with drama for Serena and the Queen B back stirring the pot. XOXO, Less-than-thrilled viewer.

-- Sara Boyd, sboyd2@greenbaypressgazette.com, Malavika Jagannathan, mjaganna@greenbaypressgazette.com.